Power in being the “only”

By Shala Marks, 2014 ProInspire Fellow

Hello, my name is Shala Marks and I am the only ________.

My experiences have allowed me to fill in that blank with a myriad of examples. It seems like all of my life I have been the only something.

Let’s see, I was the only…

• African-American female writer for my university’s newspaper (mind you, I attended one of the largest universities in the nation, undergraduate population wise);
• Journalism major in the Spirit of Service Scholars Program (a scholarship program that developed leaders into the next generation of public service professionals);
• Journalism student in all of my classes who didn’t actually want to be a journalist (talk about awkward); and
• Woman and millennial working at my company after graduation.

Then I found ProInspire.

During my first training session as all of the fellows went around the room and shared their backgrounds, I quickly discovered that yet another experience would soon make its way into my “only archives.”

I was the only creative, writer-type who had no background whatsoever in business—or at least it felt that way.

As trainings continued I realized that most of the fellows seemed knowledgeable about the business world while I struggled to keep up with terms like “framework,” “corporate social responsibility,” and “social enterprise.”

I had no clue what managing up meant and Myers-Briggs sounded like a law firm, not a personality test. I know ignorance is supposed to be bliss, but in those moments, the ego of my intelligence definitely took hit after hit.

Like most of my “only” experiences, I was concerned about fitting in, yet this fellowship added a different anxiety: What can I offer? Lacking the basic understanding of business concepts and corporate jargon made me question what value I would be able to contribute to my cohort.

I expected challenges when transitioning to the non-profit sector, but this feeling was a completely different ball game—one that I battled during the first couple months of my fellowship.

Yet, one day at work I had an Aha! moment.

I was tasked with creating a campaign to promote one of the care packages my organization sends to foster students. After spending all day conceptualizing the idea, I presented an outline to my boss—and she loved it! So much so that she wanted to launch my idea into an even larger scale campaign.

“This idea is timeless, Shala,” she said to me.

Seeing the excitement in my boss’s eyes felt great, and in that moment I realized it was all because of my “only” qualities.

I have been the only writer, or journalism major, the only creative person or black woman in many instances and oftentimes this uniqueness made me feel like an outcast.

Yet, those same attributes are what helped me bring a different voice to my university’s newspaper and highlight the underrepresented female and minority audiences when writing content for a recruiting startup. Although different, my creative skills have helped me tell compelling stories as I fashioned the voice of many organizations and people.

Merriam-Webster defines only as alone in a class or category. Before ProInspire I viewed this word negatively, yet witnessing how my skills continue to make a difference during this fellowship has taught me an important lesson: There is power in being the “only.”
As the “only,” I have the opportunity to inject a unique perspective into the conversation, whether it is with my cohort during trainings or with my colleagues in team meetings. My “only” status allows fellows to learn from my distinct background, just as I have been able to learn from each of theirs.

Right before I went to college, a family friend offered me a few words of wisdom as I struggled with trying to box my career hopes and dreams into a defined job title. She said:

Maybe your career doesn’t exist yet; you will be the one to define it.

Those words have stuck with me since age 18, and they mean so much more now that I reflect on my career journey. Each only-person moment has helped me get where I am today, and will continue to build my character and prepare me for a career that only I can create.

I have had to make many adjustments thus far during my transition from startups to non-profits. And ProInspire has really helped make the process much smoother. But what I am most grateful for is that this fellowship has helped me adjust my thinking.

So allow me to reintroduce myself,

“Hello, my name is Shala Marks, and I embrace the fact that I am the only.”